Sophie, tested. Rebirth.

1:38pm: I have a strong desire to go out tonight, but I have no one to go with. Pathetic. Me. Pathetic.

2:27pm: Falling....

I hope there is no bottom. It is endless. I want this i want this i want this :)

7:04pm: Picture update
Words to come soon ;)




Going out last night in the city.

Oh, and sample of pictures that I took..my mother was my model, haha:

2:06pm:

12:38am: I'm back in NJ--I'm getting ready for my Nantucket Island trip and awaiting the confirmation of some very good news from Women while I'm there.

I met Jaunel McKenzie while I was at the agency yesterday --> http://www.theones2watch.com/jaunel_mckenzie/jaunel.html --she was not very striking in person, though, nor very tall. Interesting look, I suppose.

Hehe I bought these crazy sunglasses today :

6:16pm: Wow, I haven't updated this thing for a while--I've been out of the loop for some time, I guess.

So. I finished my freshman year at Princeton..or shall I say, survived, hehe. But really, things went well, considering all of the pressure I was under. I'm also dating a nice 07 boy from Princeton as well, awww. Life is good. I'm spending this summer realising my creative ideas/energy through painting, writing, reading. I've also been trying to get the whole modeling thing together as I have been pretty scattered about the way I was going about it. Within the past three weeks, (I've been staying in my apartment in Manhattan), I signed with the Wilhelmina creative division for acting and commercials, R & L models for commercial print, and will be signing with Women Management next week. They were going to send me to Milan, but decided against it, as I would be cutting it a bit too close--the Italians leave in August, and well, there just isn't enough time. As for next summer, it looks like a definite possibility. Anyway, here are some pictures from two tests I arranged prior to all of this agency signing:



( Read more... )

Oooh, and, I was in Starbucks the other day and someone recognised me from livejournal, haha. Pretty funny :)

Yeah, so I'm very stressed at the moment-- I need to lose about 10-15 more pounds :( :(
-Sophie

8:59am: I need opinions
Okay, so I just received a CD of images from my last shoot, with Noah. I was not happy with the photos--I mean, they were nice, but not book-worthy. I have one photo that I'm thinking about sending to my agent, though. What do you think about this? Is it "New York" enough, or should I just forget about trying to salvage photos from the shoot?

8:46am: And my hair? What is wrong with me? I need to get that under wraps asap.

8:33am: So, anyway, I had a shoot with Noah Addis on Friday. Drove to Central Philly for this...
He was really nice and fortunately had some clothes for me to wear as I didn't have enough time to whip up something the night before. Damn Pol sci. He took 90% of the photos in film, but sent me a few that he did in digital. I'm not quite happy with them. I didn't put enough make-up on, my eyebrows look...thin, my face is puffy (that's what I get for staying out until 2 drinking liquor), and I have no eye lids??? Ugh, I'm sure the film will be better....
Or maybe I'm just ugly. Whatever =)

1:16pm: I've never felt this way--this feeling...is indescribable. I don't have the desire to do anything. Eat. Sleep. Live.
I can't stop the hurt.

8:45am: She saw. She met.
She fell.

So, she didn’t know where it would lead.
Should the end have been considered
In such young flirtations?

Closed, frigid, impenetrable, she was an
Enigma, no less, for reasons
That one cannot bear to reveal.

But she was steady. Confident.
Unwavering.
Not swayed by the glances.
Whispers.
Solitude.
She reveled in it.

He was different, though, wasn’t he?
Virtuous. Impassioned.
True.
Some quality that
Has yet to be described
In words.

Innocent late night
Visits.
Palms smooth
Upon the other.
Necks nestling
Perfectly.
Closed doors.
Shadowy rooms.
Lips. Kissed.
Perfection to be known
Only by them.

For him, she surrenders.
Slow. Steady.
Sure.
Until her heart is naked.
No retreat.

He said it was like a movie.
And it was.
Scenes so poignant.
So fantastic.
So REAL.
But was it?

A letter opened.
Bares what both
Knew to be
Undeniable.
And she. Unable
To speak.

He tossed words around
Easily. Laughingly
Asking her to be his.
Forever?
Said he
May never love another
Like this.

Yes. She was naïve.
She locked these
In her heart.
And lost the key.

Life is ever changing, no?
Nothing is
Immutable.
Nor was this.

Love isn’t supposed to
End like this.
Love isn’t supposed to
Swell in her breast
Only to be denied.

Please.
She said.
Let us try.
Let us continue.
Let us never let go
Of such purity. Such emotions.
Love can
Sustain all.

Distant looks.
Unyielding shrugs.
Rips it up and scatters it
For all to see.
Raw. Shattered.
Numb.

Innocence lost.
Retreating.
Again.
Pain that will
Never entirely fade.

So, here, the story stops.
The movie ends.

10:07am:
Wicked! You are Russian Spy Barbie! Either you're
excessively violent or you're developing
conspiracies all the time. You tend to play
both sides of situations and would much rather
be flying a MIG than thinking about us American
pigs over here. For you, the Cold War still
burns, and no one but Lenin and Dostoevskii and
other random people whose names end with -skii
can end it. You are the last great Russian
hero. I salute you.


Which slightly offensive random Barbie stereotype are you?
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Hmm, how interesting. Too tired to write.

6:07pm: I feel horribly sick right now....lack of control over my body/eating habits...what to do. what to do.

Tuesday, I'll be back at my dorm and I'll be able to regain myself once again. I can't let it spiral like it has over the break. Never again.

10:54pm: I finished a fantastic introduction for my term paper today, so I'm quite pleased with that. The paper, then, should come along rather easily tomorrow, as the intro is often a good indication as to the outcome. Most of the time anyway...

After I did my schoolwork, I went to the mall to return some things and bought: a black off-the-shoulder 80's top (H&M), a two-toned fuschia and pale pink my "favourite kitty" bag from the girl's department of H&M, black Steve Madden stilettos, sequin black and pink arm band thingy, ANDDDD....I FOUND a $70 pair of blue Bebe sneakers that someone apparently forgot! I felt awful about taking it for I know how horrid it feels to lose something (and go back and not find it..), but it was obvious that it was not going to be claimed---other people were eyeing the bag, the mall was closing...gahhhhhh I took it and thought about what I should do for the longest time ever. Anyway, I kept it. It's size 9, but it fits pretty well, haha.

11:57pm: It's going to be 2004 in approximately 3 minutes. I can't believe I'm still up. So tired and so ill.

COTTAGE: Miss Cleo says that you will marry another
Cottage alum, also from wealthy Southern stock,
and together you will bear a gaggle of
golden-haired children.


Which Princeton University Eating Club Are You In?
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Can I get any nerdier?

5:44pm: So, I'm getting smashed tonight! Woohoo. As if. Rather, I'm going to curl up with my Mummy and watch a BBC movie based on a George Eliot novel. We're going to wear our little gold new year party hats that I made and wave sparkley wands when the two lovebirds finally get together. Ah, you got to love those English flicks.

I did nothing today besides read. Such days are always nice, don't you think?



Mwahaha. My eye. And lips.



Hmm, my photos are getting tiresome. I need some innovative compositions. Or maybe I just need a new subject.

Happy New Year's.

5:40pm: D returned from Pittsburgh today because the homelife apparently became too stressful for him. He's going to work on his thesis and finish up any possible work for the next six months so we can kiss all day. hee hee. I must do the same, actually, so I'm working on Le Corbusier tonight and putting the finishing touches on another paper. I don't think I wish to attend the review session for francais classe because I dislike the prof so. Perhaps it'll be best to just return on the 5th to submit the paper to Ratsmansky and do the peer review session, then return home until the first half of the french exam on the 12th. That should give me enough time to study for french AND history, for which I have a shitload to read. I don't even know when the Architecture final is. Fook.

8:24pm: So, anyway, I went shopping yesterday with hopes of buying all these shoes that I picked out from stevemadden.com (they were all sold out in my size on the website) When I got to the mall, everything was gone. I mean, EVERYTHING was sold out!!! I thought I was going to cry. The only things that were left were in size 10 and 11. Ugh. I am going through pointy shoe withdrawal. I did order some pumps that have ballerina sashes to tie up the ankle. But they aren't pink. boohoo.
Watching all of these people rush around trying to get a hold of the (last!) Banana Republic fuchsia top and other such dowdy trash made me wonder. I do wonder if these people would be buying with such frenzy if this mass mentality of extreme consumerism after the holidays didn't exist. Most of the items weren't even that cheap--and most-- I wouldn't wear if someone chopped my tongue off. What a world we live in. I'm disgusted.

10:56am: Yay for photos! Hopefully with the little advice I received, it'll work! ;)

Let's see...

9:59pm: Maria Carlaaaa
Oh gosh, she's gorgeous. But not in a traditional sense. It's indescribable, but I think she has this wonderful unassuming quality about her <3

http://www.models.com/model_culture/tales_model/MariaCarla/images/pola_index.jpg

http://www.models.com/model_culture/tales_model/MariaCarla/images/gregkadel2.jpg

6:53pm: Going to Starbucks with R and Company :)

6:14pm: Chopped dates
are going to be my downfall. I'm addicted. Really addicted. :`(

5:25pm: Back to routine tomorrow
I planned to write my WRI essay today as well as get started on my architecture term paper. Didn't happen. Well, I did do most of the research though. Watched Roman Holiday with Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck. Audrey is so sweet and lovely. Very gamine-like qualities.

So much for starting my diet. I have absolutely no self-control, I tell ya. Tomorrow. Tomorrow, my strict regimen begins!

I want to finish all work so I can relax and be frivolous for the rest of break. Yayay! :)

I need some exciting new clothes by the way. Oi, but that is my problem, eh?

8:16pm: Fixed. Not that it matters much, but such things bother me.

8:10pm: Umm
It appears that the dates on my entries here are effed up. I posted the 1st 5 entries on Wednesday, 2 entries on Thursday, and the last one today. Ugh, lj needs to get its act together...

I feel ugly today. Fast starting tomorrow.